You're lying in bed with the man you've fallen madly in love with. What are you thinking asking someone you've known for three months that question?? If someone's divorce is taking a long time to happen, it's either financial issues, a struggle to reach an agreement or laziness. When are we going to introduce our kids to each other? He might feel angry or hatred, even, but I think that there's a part of every divorced person (whether they want to admit it or not) that will always love a little part of his or her ex no matter what. It's only been a few months, but you are SURE he's the one. Do you expect him to answer, "Now that I've met YOU, I'm going to make sure my divorce is final next week so we can move in together, get married, merge our families and live happily ever after! I do know a few divorced guys who dive in head first into every relationship and end up divorced three or four times. That doesn't mean he will never get serious with you. No offense, but at the beginning of a relationship, the two of you are into each other. My opinion (and you can take it or leave it) is that you better be pretty darn sure it's going to work out when you bring your kids into the mix. If you have to say that to someone, you have your answer: Because he doesn't. I think I'll always be evolving in that department.
A few weeks later, I noticed that Jamie's number was often busy. "Because his number has been busy a lot." She hesitated, and I felt an immediate stab of jealousy. "Jamie and I have been seeing each other in real life," she said. avoided real-life relationships in favor of a fantasy.
Then one evening, Patty casually mentioned she'd spoken to him the night before. That night, I tested out my sneaking suspicion by directing a fabricated accusation at him: "Patty tells me the two of you have been having phone sex," I said. I'd chosen Jamie for the very reasons he'd chosen me: We were terrified of intimacy. I was able to identify unavailable men and avoid them.
Again, are you sure you want to hear the answer to this question?
Great questions to ask someone you've dated for less than a year: 1.
Maybe." The answer will always be "no," but you will never really know.