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But staying in contact with your ex following a breakup? By remaining in each other’s lives, you run the risk of a post-breakup rendezvous, holding onto feelings for your ex, and in general delaying your ability to heal and move on quickly (and without additional heartache). This is actually one of the single most important steps you can follow during your breakup recovery. No Online Ex-Bashing After a breakup, it’s only natural to feel some residual anger, resentment, bitterness, etc.
The following are some tips to help you avoid a post-breakup backslide into your ex’s arms, and instead ease you into your happily ever after future: Create new Boundaries Your best defense after a breakup? That means no phone calls, no e-mails, no texting, and definitely no late-night visits. That means it’s time to “ex-tricate” him or her from your life. You just have to create special new boundaries, only dealing with and talking to your ex when absolutely necessary about your common interests, i.e., the children, business, work. And in the era of social networking sites and You Tube, it’s all too easy to go online and spew in front of millions of readers/viewers. By going online and bashing your ex on your blog, via video diary, or to everyone in your social network, you are inviting bad breakup karma into your life. Handle the Dreaded Run-in with Class While it would be fabulous if your ex could be automatically ejected from the planet following the breakup, that technology has yet to be invented.
In giving yourself a six-month cushion, you greatly increase your chances of getting over your ex.
In the throes of post-breakup angst, you may not like the sound of that. Rather than fight what you know is right for you, give yourself permission to put the six-month rule into practice.
What if you can’t completely cut off contact because you have children together, run a business together, or work together? If your ex wants to know how you’re handling the breakup? And you know what they say—what comes around goes around. And depending on the size of the city you live in, a post-breakup run-in with your ex is not only possible, it’s probable. Bumping into him does not mean that the two of you are meant to be together.