Be honest with yourself and each other about the limitations a disability might bring to a relationship. By openly discussing the physical challenges as a couple, you’ll be working to overcome a far more common (and destructive) kind of dating disability: lack of communication.
Sometimes it comes in a “broken” container — one that goes about in a wheelchair or on crutches. “When people meet me, sometimes they say, ‘Oh my God, she’s disabled,’” says Ruotolo, who stands (with help from her constant companions, a pair of crutches) a little over four-foot-two in her Jimmy Choos — hence the title of her memoir, Unstoppable in Stilettos.
“But once we get to know each other, those feelings go away.” “I still have the same personality, the same bad sense of humor, the same love of trivia,” says Oliver, 38, who was paralyzed in a body-surfing accident when he was 21.
Marietta was among the dozen or so guests already seated at the table when he finally arrived, half frozen, snow still clinging to his hair.
“I couldn’t tell you who else was in the room that night,” Stephen said like a bashful teenager, years later.
Marietta seemed to know that it was a pivotal moment. Most men can’t see past the chair.” Stephen froze, and for a moment it looked as if he might be like “most men” and turn away.