I live in the same neighborhood with Adonis, and considered ahead of time that it happen that we’d run into each other. Anyways, I wore a cute bare-shouldered top, hair in beachy waves, and a glossy red lip. Neither he nor I have spent one fraction of a second together under the impression that our involvement was monogamous–not by a long shot! I just wanted to maybe just to give him a wink, a knowing glance to let him know ‘I see you. It would have been a human and decent thing for him to do, to show recognition to me, as someone he’d been intimate with recently. Maybe, like a gorgeous flower, he’s giving himself and others experiences of pleasure and beauty when he can. It’s part of the brilliance that besides his physical attractiveness appeals to me about him. Dancing together, goofing off with his friends and loving the music. The opposite of dating horror stories; on a dream date, you feel like a million bucks, and your date seems equally delighted.
He’s just a captivating guy I’ve dated with absolutely zero promises, and good for him. In my opinion, it is actually not cool or very nice to ignore people you are on good terms with and even less nice if they’re an object of your affections. As Tim and I stood out front messing with our bicycles, I did what I probably shouldn’t have; I glanced back in the restaurant window to see if I was being seen. -Mary Oliver, It is an appreciation of beauty, life and pleasure that takes my breath away. Maybe he’s living his life honestly but trying not to overthink. If I had to choose right now, for all time, whether I wanted a string of enchanting dream dates without attachment, or a stable, serious, long-term, monogamous relationship, I’d chose the former, hands down! This time, I saw him just as I was rubbing handwash all over my hands with a grossed-out face after leaving the Porta Potty. Like the best dreams, it stands alone, carrying no obligation to the future and needing no memory of the past.
Yeah, I’ll always have my memory of the perfect date with Adonis, but what’s way more important, I’ll always remember the joy of spending time like this day with Tim. Whether I ever settle down into something stable again some day, or stick with a string of passionate encounters, I’ll always have myself, too. Even if someone beautiful wasn’t about to come over I’d feel the same. His artwork, books, musical instruments, and antique furniture filled the high-ceilinged rooms. I held off, for now, and he wouldn’t drink yet either, because he’d have to fly. But that wasn’t the end at all, it continued to develop like a seven-course meal. Each laying hold of a wing, we pushed the craft out to the open field beside the runway.
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Sharing each other’s presence, I got more of a sense of his vulnerability and intimacy than I get from most people ever. In between dates, we have been practically strangers to each other. (In hindsight, red flag, obviously – be careful when somebody picks you up on the street! It was endearing and revealing to learn what he calls me and to see his reaction to my secret name for him. My head spun a little with surprise and delight at this unusual, for him, self-revelation and the awkward attempt at a compliment. I like it so much I almost want to trade out the name Molly Undercover for it! When ‘Wild Animal Man’ moves on, as I’m sure he will sooner or later, I’ve decided I get to keep this nickname. ‘Wild Animal Man’ came from another friend who exclaimed that he was a wild animal when I recounted to her how he’d curled up one weeknight right on my front porch and fell asleep, snoring like an bear, feet sticking eighteen inches off the porch furniture.
the connection was on many levels.) But, he has proved to be also only ’emotionally available’, for fleeting hours of face time, and with no promises. Another very cute guy, I met while out for a walk in my city neighborhood. Here’s why: actually after some questioning I learned he was still living with his wife, the mother of his children, and she didn’t know he was out picking up ladies AND he’d just right then lied to me first and told me he lived alone. I should have known by the way he scurried along the gutter. A couple of weeks ago, ‘Wild Animal Man’ aka, ‘The Centaur’ and I had a funny exchange. A little background on how my nicknames for him evolved: ‘The Centaur’ was coined by a mutual friend one night, after this undomesticated man-person had stomped around at a party in only cowboy boots and sparkly spandex. The nickname just fit his oversized, beautiful presence.
We went thrifting and Tim started crafting his nefarious Halloween costume plans with our thrift store booty! Also, does it mean something if a man I’ve been casually dating lately with wants to watch the once-in-a-lifetime in our region solar eclipse with me? I’m not sure I’m cool with the conclusions he might draw if I took him up on his invitation–might infringe on my single self. It’s time for another round of dating horror stories: I am getting over being sick and only out with this dude due to boredom. When a guy launches into a speech on the first date “I’m almost too nice. He asked me to hold off for a few more minutes so he could better groom his magnificent self. Maybe overly smooth, but Adonis has got game, I’ll give him that. I was touched that he’d share this part of his life with me.